Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Call It "The Al Corps"

Via Reuters

(Oh, Good God....someone hold me back!)

"NEW YORK (Reuters) - Al Gore hopes to train 1,000 messengers he hopes will spread out across the country and present a slide show about global warming that captures the essence of his Hollywood documentary and book.
(You have to train people to sit around and YAWN? That would capture the essence, I think.)

The former vice president, a Democrat, said on Monday that by the end of the summer he would start a bipartisan education campaign to train 1,000 people to give a version of his slide show on global warming featured in the film "An Inconvenient Truth" and book of the same name.
("The ants go marching 2 by 2, hoorah hoorah. The ants go marching 2 by 2, Hoorah, Hoorah....!")

"This moment cannot be allowed to pass," Gore told reporters in New York. "I have seen and heard times before when the awareness of the climate crisis has peaked and then a few months later it's gone. I think this time is different, but I have to say I'm not certain of that."
(Well at least he's honest-there's alot we could say he's not certain about, same for his "experts".)

The book is an expanded version of the film. Both are based on a slide show he has given more than 1,000 times over the past 30 years on the dangers of global warming. He says climate change is a crisis that has become a moral issue.
"Ox carts-GOOD! Cars-BAD!" Man, I feel sooooo immoral for having a flush toilet. I'm a worthless greedy sponge upon Mutha Earth because I use a 20 yr. old Maytag to wash my superfluous evil excess of clothes instead of pounding them on a rock and using a yucca root for suds. I will burn in an eternal hell for having a lawn mower. I am a electricity whore. I need to be spanked...hard...and repeatedly. Hey Al, how moral did Tipper feel picking up your suits from the dry cleaners in that honkin' SUV that I know you guys have? These yahoos won't be happy until we are reduced to living in mudhuts, like our more "enlightened" brethern of the planet.)

Most scientists believe carbon dioxide and other greenhouse gases trap the sun's heat in the atmosphere leading to stronger storms and rising sea levels that could swamp low-lying islands by 2100.
(Hmmmmm, let's see, 2100 minus 2006 equals...We'll be dead anyway! And our kids will be too old to care, too! But it is nice to know that my grandkids will have beachfront property if the family ranch here is still in our hands! That is, if the legions of nattering Algorite pinheads haven't seized it because we were 'squandering' resources or that my acreage is the only remaining territory of the left titted greater spotted Marvin's trailing picklevine.)

Gore said all the profits from his film and the book will be donated to train the messengers. He said the carriers of the message will give the slide show at high schools and rotary clubs in the United States and around the world.
(Oh just let 'em try to speak to our Lion's Club...OH PLEASE! It'll be such fun...and I'll even bake a cake!)

Gore said on Monday, as he has consistently, that he had no plans to run for president in 2008. He added that he would continue to give the slide show even as the messengers give their versions of it."
( "Their versions..." You can just see how that will morph into the ultimate shrieking moonbat fury of impending doom. Good lord...I can't wait...oh and, neither can the earth, I reckon.


Anonymous beth said...

Great post! I love it!

6/13/2006 11:15 PM  
Anonymous squirley said...

He must not plan on making a whole lot on his book and movie if he can only train 1000 from the procedes.

Let's see, a thousand ministers of doom for how many million people? I don't think you will have to worry about anyone coming to your town anytime soon.

6/14/2006 6:23 AM  
Blogger Walker said...

I really do think that in every era the elites concoct some sort of philosophy that separates them (the elites) from the regular people (the poorly dressed minions with bad hair cuts).

In the age of monarchies, they were the elite chosen by God to rule and we all had to be their feudal starving workers. In the age of socialism, they were the Party and we all had to be their starving worker comrades.

But, in the modern United States, the elites just don't feel elite enough. Hence, global warming! Pretty soon, it will be back the way they like it. And we'll be walking and starving again.

6/14/2006 8:43 AM  
Blogger white trash republican said...

Good point, Squirley!
But all it takes is one Chicken Little at the right school, spouting this "science" to sqealch the ambitions of a few impressionable kids.
Been there, done that...still have my 'enviroment symbol' T-shirt from 1974.

Have I mentioned lately how much I abhor these types? ; )

6/14/2006 8:46 AM  
Blogger white trash republican said...

Well said, Walker!
Must'nt let the great unwashed masses with their "ig'nert" thinking get the upper hand!
I'm just bitter and skeptical because I went through all this before, all to naught. One thing these "theories" do is scare the beejeezuz outta some young minds. I actually knew a teen in the 70's who opted to kill themselves because they were so distraught and depressed over the future, as protrayed by these experts. They honestly felt their life wasn't gonna be worth living! The earth would be inhabitable, so why go on?
This is the darkside of 'enviromentalism' noone talks about. But I'm sure they are aware and honestly don't care!

6/14/2006 8:57 AM  
Blogger Walker said...

Don't care? Why, WTR, THEY LOVE SUICIDE. The more dead people, the better they like it. People ARE the problem.

Wasn't there some enviro-idiot recently who came right out and said that it would be great if bird flu killed 100 million people? Can't remember the details now.

6/14/2006 12:25 PM  
Blogger Walker said...

Gawd, your "ants go marching" comment made me laugh. Thanks! LOL

6/14/2006 12:26 PM  
Blogger The_Bos'un said...

Excellent Post. And I really like the Chairman Mao lookalike picture. Good old AL and the Peoples Republice of Left-Wing Whackoism.

I like your weblog and your message. Have a great blogging day.


6/15/2006 1:03 AM  

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