Sunday, August 06, 2006

"Have *Reefer, Will Travel" (Mr. Green Helmet, unlidded)

(*Lest anyone think I'm up to no good, 'reefer' is trucker slang for a refridgerator truck.)

The wait and speculation is over!! For weeks now and in some cases, years, folks have been speculating on the identity of that fellow known to everyone as "Green Helmet". He's been the hardest working man in Hezballah, always there whenever disaster (whether real or contrived) hit, tirelessly and selflessly pulling the grim remains out of rubble and wreckage and hoisting them up for the carefully orchestrated photo-op. The guy's everywhere! He's in Beirut, he's in Tyre, he's in Qana. What dedication! My God, how does he do it?! are sooooo busted!

Now the big revelation isn't so much that 'gosh, you mean these pictures are staged??!'
Jeez, we knew that already...duh. Everyone and their dog knew that. The big revelation is that now we've busted them and have proof of their phoney baloney, sick n twisted propaganda and it's 'behind the scenes' biz. Most of us suspected that they were using bodies from other sources, but how pray tell were they sneaking them in...and in the blazing heat?
It makes sense that a mortician would be just the guy to go to. Now all the pieces are starting to fit.

Mr. Jradi...iffin y'all are gonna be the mystery man of Hezballah propaganda, it's always a good idea to keep your mouth shut. Talking to the press, even if you figured it was to further the cause and subsequent outrage just cost you an award. You'll never get to gaze at that gold painted dog turd sitting on your mantle for Best Supporting Actor in a Patently Staged and Faked Tragedy. You blew it, my man. You thought we'd never put 2 and 2 together, bet you think that we all think that all you Hezzies look alike, right?

Y'know, it just ain't gonna be the same, now that we have put a name to the face.

EU Referendum has Qana, the Director's Cut ! Great background piece reviewing Green Hel...uh, Mr. Jradi's latest work.


Blogger Bonnie said...

This is just too heavy for me. I'm still trying to figure out who shot J.R.!

8/07/2006 9:37 AM  

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